While you’re waiting for Thursday to roll around you can listen to three amazing stories from our show that made it onto the KNKX Sound Effect podcast. I pasted small blurbs from the Sound Effect website to give you a taste of what each story is about 🙂
“He didn’t know it at the time, but that experience would pave the way for Cossum’s new line of work once he returned to the States: He became a phone sex operator. And if that sounds like a departure from the life of a soldier, there’s one more thing you ought to know: Cossum would offer phone sex in the voice and persona of a woman. “
“While Hawkins had gone through basic training, his role was supposed to be documenting the war, not fighting it. But around Thanksgiving 1967, Rich found himself right in the middle of the storm.
Listen to the story, and hear how Hawkins came to the conclusion that for people to be prepared to die for something they were against is an example of how the system works.”
Lastly, if you’re curious about the story I told in front of my friends from high school who showed at Roy Street last month, you can listen to it here:
Thank you all for being a part of FGS. This show means a lot to people and I appreciate everyone who comes out to either share a story or supports the folks who do. Meetup doesn’t let me put emojis in these emails but if it did there would be a big heart right here.
in 2005, the right side of my body began to go numb. I got tested for all kinds of diseases and conditions, underwent two MRIs, and saw chiropractors and massage therapists, but no one could figure out what was wrong. As a single parent, I didn’t have a lot of money to spend on health care, so I decided to just limp around and learn to live with whatever was wrong with me.
A few months after the problem began, I started dating a woman who’d recently been through a difficult divorce. Why she decided to go out with a man whose foot flopped about and whose arm dropped off the chair, I’ll never know.
Despite my growing affection for her, I hesitated to tell her how I felt. She had two kids who were struggling with their new living arrangements and a small business that kept her at work sixty-plus hours a week. She didn’t need to deal with my problems too.
One night we were lying in bed together, and I was in worse shape than usual. I had to tuck my hand underneath me just to keep my arm from falling over the side. Sensing my pain, she took my head in her hands and said, “You know I love you, right?”
My body suddenly went stiff, my right leg seized up, and the back of my skull radiated with pain. I felt like I had just grabbed both ends of live jumper cables. A second later, when I started breathing again, without thinking, I whispered, “I love you too.” And just as quickly all the pain disappeared. The symptoms never came back. It was one of the most profound moments of my life.
Five years later that woman was gone. I remember standing on her porch on New Year’s Day, watching her close the door as she whispered, “I can’t see you anymore.” I’ll never forget the quiet, solid click of that door.
Those two moments are more than just memories to me. They’re part of my emotional DNA. If I had another kid tomorrow she would grow up with those memories inside her without me ever saying a word. Until recently, I would have traded those memories for anything. I would have sold them for a nickel. I would have traded them for a sandwich. They were two of a thousand moments I wish I hadn’t lived through.
But it occurred to me today that it’s not the memories that hurt it’s what they represent. They represent a life I had for a while but couldn’t keep. My heart is full of moments like these and they all remind me of something I loved and then lost. What if I found a way to keep those moments but let go of all the painful things they represent?
I was struggling all day today trying to figure out how I could do that when I suddenly realized that I had just done it last Thursday. I told a story about a time I spent gasping for air in the ER thinking I was going to die. It turned out to be the most transformative story I’ve ever told. When I said the last line, 35 years of anger washed through me. I’ve never felt so clean after telling a story.
Maybe storytelling is a way to say goodbye to something without getting rid of it. Maybe stories are like little washing machines you can put all those terrible memories in and a few weeks later they come out as shiny little moments that don’t hurt anymore. I used to think of storytelling as a way to pull painful things out of my heart and give them away as stories. Now I’m starting to think that maybe I don’t have to empty out my heart to move on. Maybe I can keep all the moments that made me who I am and just say goodbye to the loss they represent.
Luckily, saying goodbye is what our next show is all about. Bring a story about a time you had to say goodbye to something. It could be a person, a place, a job, a belief, just about anything. Make sure it has a beginning, middle, and an end and that you can tell it in under 8 minutes. Remember to keep it clean, practice out loud as much as possible, and run it by friends if you can. Those are the best ways I know to tighten up a story and figure out where to make changes. And you can always call or write me if you need any help.
The show is August 23, at 7pm, at Roy Street Coffee and Tea.
Thanks to everyone who came out to the show last Thursday. We had a great collection of tellers including some first-timers I hope to see again soon.
Maryanne started us off with a story of all the ghosts her mother made her pray to each night before she went to sleep. They weren’t ghosts in the traditional sense with rattling chains and a Christmas turkey. They were the spirits of relatives her mother still missed. I was frozen to my chair within the first 30 seconds of this story. It reminded me of listening to my own mother call on the dead for support in moments of need. I’d never shared that with anyone. It was too weird for me to even make fun of when I was a kid. It was just something I kept to myself and hoped my mom wouldn’t do in front of my friends. That night, as Maryanne began her story, I was right back in our apartment on 29th street in Anchorage, AK listening to my mother invoking the dead. Maryanne and I have a lot to talk about in the next few weeks.
Next up was Ed, who was up from California. He told a story about going to Vietnam in the 60s but ending up in South Korea guarding the Demilitarized Zone. I don’t know for sure, but it’s possible that we were all saved from an early start to the Korean War because Ed and his buddies were too high, drunk, and full of mischief to care about crossing the DMZ. Thousands of lives may have been saved because Ed and his friends were too busy playing kazoos and stealing their commander’s underwear to worry North Korea very much.
Then Bruce told us about a mysterious newsletter that showed up at his house in Long Island, NY in the 90s. He tried to throw it away but somehow it called him to take it out of the trash and give it another look. We know from other stories Bruce has told, that this newsletter eventually brought him across the country to Yelm, Washington, where he lived behind a long stone wall, learning the secrets of the universe. I have a feeling that one of these days Bruce will do a one-man show where he shares with us everything he learned in the years he spent behind that wall.
One of our first-timers, Maribeth, hopped up to the stage on one crutch and told us about a horrific snowmobile accident she had two days before Christmas in 2016. You want to know the one thing you never want to hear after crashing your snowmobile? It’s the phrase, “Can you wiggle your toes?” Cute thing to say to a two-year-old but not a grown woman laying on her back pinned under a 700lb Skidoo. Maribeth went from posting pictures on Instagram about her life in Manhattan to wondering if she’d ever walk again. Thank you, Maribeth, for showing us how far you’ve come in the last 18 months and how far strength and gratitude can take us in life.
Elliot was next and told a story about throwing his back out from coughing. I was so glad to learn that I’m not the only one who has done that! The worst part was that it affected his workload. Elliot’s a phone sex operator and I guess no one wants to talk to a depressed phone sex operator who occasionally yelps in pain completely out of context. Well, maybe some people do but not enough to pay the rent. Fortunately, Elliot is healthy again and back to making people happy. If you’ve ever heard Elliot on the phone you’ll know that the world is a better place with Elliot back in the saddle.
Carl, one of our regulars, told a quick story about the time he demanded a Parisian bullet train turn around so he could get to where he needed to go. It’s great that Carl feels his powers of persuasion are so great that he thinks he could talk a French train conductor into hanging a U-turn and taking him to Spain. I’m not sure if Carl believes he can manifest that kind of reality or if he’s just really good at manifesting a few bottles of wine and seeing how things turn out.
Tracey, one of our regulars I’ve had the pleasure of sharing stages with around town, told us about finding something strange and unsettling in her husband’s sock drawer and how she spent years trying to accept something about her husband she never suspected. It was a relief when she finally realized that love doesn’t always conquer all. Sometimes giving up is the best way to move forward.
The teller who most touched my heart that night was 11-year-old April. April came to the show last month and sat right down front with her big sister. I could tell she loved the show but I didn’t expect her to come back a few weeks later and tell her own story. She told the story of how her parents’ marriage changed when she was 5 and how she’s learned to deal with it. After the show, one of my friends in the audience wrote, “How does an 11-year-old have more composure and acceptance than the rest of us?” I don’t know, man, but it was amazing to watch this little girl walk up to the microphone and tell the biggest story of her life. No way could I have done that at her age. I wasn’t able to do it at twice her age. Lauree, thank you for bringing April to the show. Storytelling has helped me through so many difficult times in my life. I’m glad we could be here for April to learn how to do that herself.
Thanks again to everyone in the audience for being so kind and patient with all our tellers. It’s not easy getting up there and a lot of people are doing this for the first time. Knowing that you’re wishing them the best up there makes a big difference.
Also, thanks for the amazing reaction to my own story that I told that night. It was a new story that I wrote for my friend David and two people from high school I haven’t seen since 1984. If you read my last group email you know who I’m talking about. I couldn’t have asked for a better night or more receptive audience to share that story with. I’ll get the audio up sometime this week. It’s one of the few stories I feel ok putting online so I’ll let you know when that happens.
Our next show is August, 23 and the theme is “Goodbyes.” I’ll get the official invite out as soon as possible.
The recorder did its job so if any of the tellers want a recording of their story just send me an email. I only provide audio to the people who told a story and it’s only of the story they told. Most of the stories we hear at FGS are very personal and the tellers don’t want them posted online. That’s why you see so few of them on our blog and Facebook page.
Just a reminder that our next show is coming up this Thursday. The theme is “Wake Up Call.” From the slow murmur that ran through the audience last month when I announced the theme, I figure at least a few of you have had one of those. I’m looking forward to hearing those stories!
Also, if you read my thank you email from last month’s show you know that three people from my past will be at this show and I’m testing my courage by telling a new story that night. Two of the popular girls from high school will be in the audience and I can only assume they are there to see if I’ve become marginally more interesting since the 80s. I didn’t have the courage to talk to them in the halls of West Anchorage High so let’s see how I do now in a coffee shop on Capitol Hill.
The reason they’re coming is because of the third person from Alaska in the audience that night, my friend David. I’ve known David since 2nd grade when we were in Cub Scouts together and he was better than me at everything from building Popsicle stick boats to field dressing an elk. David doesn’t understand fear because David is a bush pilot, mountain man, salmon catcher, and cabin builder. He’s the kind of guy who doesn’t even take matches when he goes camping. He just rubs his hands over a cotton ball and suddenly everyone’s marshmallow is on fire.
Naturally, he thought it would be fun to invite Chantal and Shelly to the show. One cheerleader and one captain of the volleyball team. I’m sure they are mature, accomplished women now. They are probably leaders in their fields and get great 360 reviews from their co-workers. I’m sure they have no idea that I spent all four years of high school wondering what they had that I didn’t.
Truthfully, they were always polite to me. If I had asked Chantal to dance at the Harvest Ball she would probably have danced with me as long as it wasn’t a slow song. If I’d asked Shelly for a ride home from soccer practice she would probably have let me ride in the back as long as her boyfriend and varsity wrestler Eric Holta sat in the front. All the stories I told myself about how cool they were and how uncool I was were just things I made up in my head. They were fig newtons of my imagination.
At least that’s what I’ve been telling my therapist. Now I get to test that belief in real life. Thursday night I’m going to tell a true, personal story in front of one over-achieving friend and two women I was too scared to talk to 40 years ago. Come out and see how I handle it!
One last thing before I let you go. The wonderful and amazing Risk! storytelling podcast wrote me the other day to ask if anyone from FGS would like to tell a story when they bring their live show to Seattle in September. Risk! is a great show and you should all pitch them a story. Seriously. Do it!
Here is a short video from host and creator, Kevin Allison, with some tips on how to make a good pitch:
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RISK! Live Show
The Vera Project
305 Harrison St,
Seattle, WA 98109
Show date: 9/7/18
Submission deadline: 8/3/18
Themes: The Worst, Glorious, Breakdown
Note: Stories are not required to fit under this theme. It’s just a jumping off point to help you brainstorm about stories you have. We cast excellent true stories over stories that simply fit the theme but are less compelling.
Send pitches to: pitches@risk-show.com
RISK! Is a live show and podcast “where people tell true stories they never thought they’d dare to share in public” hosted by Kevin Allison, of the legendary TV sketch comedy troupe The State. RISK! has featured people like Janeane Garofalo, Lisa Lampanelli, Kevin Nealon, Margaret Cho, Marc Maron, Sarah Silverman, and regular folks from around the world, dropping the act and showing a side of themselves we’ve never seen before. The RISK! podcast gets over 1.5 million downloads each month. Slate.com called it “jaw-dropping, hysterically funny, and just plain touching.”
RISK! is not like other storytelling shows. It’s “where people tell true stories they never thought they’d dare to share in public.” We encourage our storytellers to step out on a limb, be brutally candid and emotionally raw. This is an uncensored show where taboos are tackled and people talk about things they ordinarily might not share in mixed company, but might save for their therapist.
For more information about what we look for in story pitches and how to submit, go to http://risk-show.com/submissions and send us your pitch by 8/3/18 to be considered!
This month’s theme is “Wake Up Call – The things we can’t avoid”
One of my favorite moments from last month’s show was when I announced the next theme and there was an audible whispering that came up from the audience that let me know I’d hit a nerve. Good to know that I’m not the only one who’s had a few wake up calls in his life. Normally, I would include a story in the invite but since an old friend is coming down from Alaska for this show I’m going to save it for the stage and tell it that night.
If you’d like to join me onstage that night, bring a story about a time when life gave you a wake up call. Did you ignore it and let it ring through to voicemail, or did you pick yourself up and head over to the Barnes & Noble self-help section?
Remember to keep it clean, practice out loud and on friends as much as possible, and time yourself so you know it’s under 8 minutes.
Here are the rules and guidelines for telling a story if you haven’t seen them in a while.
Fresh Ground Stories 